A church wedding represents more than a postcard venue

By Chris O'Neill
Office of Marriage and Family Life

Undoubtedly, one of the best things about getting married in the Catholic Church is getting married in the church itself – meaning the actual church space.

There is just something undeniably attractive about the “Catholic wedding” in our imaginations. The arches and windows, the candles and the statues, the bride walking down the aisle to meet her groom at the altar all contribute to tell the story of the dignity and beauty of marriage.

After all, it is the story of divine love: of “Christ the Groom” who lays down his life for the church, his bride.

Self-giving love

Each of the weddings celebrated in the church tells this story, and every married couple, in a sense, acts this story out and adopts it as the story of their life. It’s such a beautiful and compelling story that, even in the midst of our time’s deep confusion and doubt about marriage, men and women still seek a place where they can walk down the aisle, meet at the altar and begin their life together with joy and hope for what is to come.

A wedding in a Catholic church, even in its simplest and most modest forms, is a beautiful, even awe-inspiring, thing to see. Contrary to popular belief, a Catholic wedding need not be an enormous (and enormously expensive) affair. All that is required is a bride, a groom, a priest or a deacon, and a few witnesses.

I’ve attended weddings held on a Tuesday afternoon with the groom dressed in an ordinary suit and the bride in a simple dress, along with a handful of family and friends present – no photographers, no wedding coordinators, no florists. And, even then, the beautiful story of Christ’s love for the Church was acted out, celebrated and experienced with joy.

Our faith in Christ, who loves us, can just as beautifully be expressed by a full symphonic orchestra and choir performing Mozart’s Mass in C-Major, which is also an experience you should not pass up if you ever get the chance!

But the size and grandeur of the wedding isn’t what is important. The faith of the tiny mustard seed and that of the fully grown bush is the same faith – just expressed in a different time and a different place. Indeed, the seed’s faith is more important than what is expressed by the bush, because the bush knows that whatever its beauty and strength, it could not have existed without the seed.

Manifestation of faith

A Catholic wedding in a Catholic church is a powerful expression of our faith. It is an expression of the faith of the couple who are acting out once again the love of Christ and the church. And the church building, with its aisle and altar and all the rest, is an enduring expression of the faith of the countless people who poured their hearts into building them and taking care of them over the years.

A church is not just a pretty space – a grand, but empty stage where any and every kind of story can be told. It is the consecrated space where the love of God and his people is acted out, expressed and experienced.

For the couple, the church’s beauty is a sign of what can emerge when the seed of faith is nurtured and cared for – what can happen in their own lives if they strive to deepen their awareness of spiritual things and develop their skills to give expression to them in the life they build together. That is what makes a Catholic church the natural and best place for a Catholic wedding.

Christopher O’Neill is the director of the archdiocesan Office of Marriage and Family Life. He can be reached at [email protected].