2020 taught us to cling to ‘things that mattered’

Many of us have said good riddance to 2020.

A year of hardship, of loss, and, for so many, a year of suffering. Surely 2021 must bring about change, as we look forward with optimism to a new year.

With the uncertainty, stress and loss that came with the pandemic – and that will, without a doubt, continue into 2021 as vaccinations continue to be rolled out worldwide, alongside the intense polarities in politics and an election year – it’s no doubt that 2020 will go down as a year never desired to be repeated.

Yet, there are still silver linings.

These past months have encouraged many to refocus, to commit to change, to become re-inspired by the things that matter.

While some have been frustrated by the mandates to stay at home, to curb non-essential activities and travel, to limit gatherings, among many other inconveniences created by a global pandemic, others have taken these frustrations and turned them into opportunities.

2020 allowed my husband and me to refocus. Spending most of our time together in our house, backyard and outdoor parks – alongside working from home and learning the best ways to parent our toddlers – brought us closer and taught us how to manage conflict. Our relationship will never be perfect – what relationship is? – but the necessity of working alongside one another revealed aspects of co-parenting and partnership that we would, perhaps, never have discovered.

These past months also have allowed us to grow as a family. With everyone at home, we have watched our babies grow into toddlers.

We’ve been able to experience and be a part of each new clothing size and each new milestone reached. The first steps, the first run, the first tumble – all were within a holler’s distance: “Come and see!”

Spending this time with our boys, we’ve been able to appreciate their ever-growing personalities and truly understand how vital parental presence is in these first years.

The past year presented so many challenges and obstacles. It would be ridiculous to paint a glossy picture of ideal life, of life untouched by the difficulties of the world surrounding us.

In the midst of tantrums and boredom, it would have been wonderful to escape to a museum – to play and experience with the sensory activities for toddlers that have not reopened since March. Exploring a new city, too, brings new appeal when most aspects have been placed off-limits. In addition, self-care and mental health have taken on greater significance in 2020 – both in our families and in national (and international) conversations.

So, while we’ve rung in a new year, with new hopes and dreams, I’m grateful for the opportunities I found in 2020. We have all been tested in this journey – we have all encountered challenges and difficulties. Those challenges will continue. After all, that’s a part of life.

Yet, as we redirect our attention to 2021, I’m hopeful that we can learn from the past year. We can look for our own growth and adaptation and how we refocused energy on the things that matter.

In 2021, may we continue to grow in our relationships with one another; may we not take for granted the necessity of our presence in the lives of others (even in the midst of full toddler meltdowns over things we cannot understand) and learn to appreciate the necessity of both time together and time apart.

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