Home becomes a true haven in time of COVID-19

When I began homeschooling over 10 years ago, weekly date nights with my husband were firmly placed as a high priority. I needed that time to recharge, and I didn’t care if we could only afford canned tuna and crackers for dinner – we were going on a date!

Unfortunately, COVID-19 forced our date nights to come to a screeching halt. It wasn’t immediately unbearable, but the longer we went without that time alone, the more we struggled. When the restrictions finally lifted a little, my parents were ready and willing to enjoy some time with their grandchildren again, so we planned a date.

Restaurants had opened with occupancy restrictions in place, but I couldn’t muster the desire to go anywhere. It wasn’t that I was afraid of getting sick; I was exhausted from thinking about all of it!

COVID-19 had been flooding every inch of our lives, and all I wanted was to escape.

Instead of going out, we picked up dinner and went home to eat in peace. Before COVID-19, I would have absolutely hated this idea. By the end of the week, I was like a puppy waiting to be released from its kennel, bursting with desire to get out of the house. Suddenly, that craving had vanished. The world had become a major source of stress, and being home alone with my husband was all that my heart desired.

This change in our routine turned out to be quite beneficial to our marriage. In these last few months, we have shared more intimate conversations than ever before. Since there are no televisions surrounding us or restaurant servers politely interrupting our conversations, we were free to talk in ways that weren’t possible in a restaurant setting. We had never noticed how restricted our conversations had been before. The simplicity of our home turned out to be the perfect place for a fruitful date.

It was like the Holy Spirit had pulled up a chair at our dining room table and had been patiently waiting to guide our relationship to a whole new level.

With this newfound intimacy came the realization that we had some hidden issues in our marriage. The deeper we dove into our discussions, the more light we let shine into the dark places we had been neglecting.

This growth has been both painful and joyful. God has worked miracles in us – all because we have allowed ourselves to be open to receiving his graces.

I used to scoff at the mere suggestion of a date night at home. I always looked forward to going out and sharing chips and salsa with my husband, while we casually reflected on our week. Somehow, COVID-19 changed all of that. The same virus responsible for so much pain and suffering in our world also contributed to the healing of our marriage.

As Pope Francis once reminded us, “Our God is the God of surprises.”

Jenny Dendinger is a Louisiana native who married her high school sweetheart, Buddy, after he stole her heart at their neighborhood bus stop over 20 years ago.

She currently spends her days perpetually reheating her coffee while clinging to Mama Mary for help as she homeschools their five children. Because big family life is always full of surprises, she is a firm believer in the vital refreshment that results from continuing to date her husband. She is also known to appreciate the comfort of her daddy’s Monday night red beans, the thrill of hunting for treasure at garage sales and the satisfaction of a sweet victory on family game night.

While her house has all the familiar traits of a homeschooling family – hopelessly messy and overflowing with books – her favorite lessons involve putting aside their formal work and going beyond the walls of their home to put their faith into action. Even though it isn’t always easy, Jenny constantly strives to live simply, speak truthfully, give generously and pray unceasingly.

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