May their birthdays always be magical

By Dr. Heather Bozant Witcher
Clarion Herald 

One whole hand. That’s how old my twins are – and how many years of parenting I celebrated this past week.

It still seems surreal. Their excitement at turning 5 was unparalleled to previous birthdays, showing that they now seem to understand the concept. Or at least they understand that they get presents and are the center of attention at birthday parties.

That morning, when I opened their bedroom door and sing-songed my usual, “Good morning,” both boys popped out of their beds like jack-in-the-boxes. “Is it today?” one said sleepily, rubbing his eyes. “Am I 5!?” shouted the other, bouncing toward me.

As we sang happy birthday, their sleepiness subsided, replaced with awe. By the time they had gotten dressed, I had brought their younger brother into the dining room, which had been transformed into a Jurassic-era landscape.

Dinosaur balloons, T-rex cutouts, volcano props and paper palm trees greeted them, as they ran into the room to eat their favorite chosen breakfasts. Later that day, after school, I brought out their homemade dinosaur landscape cake. Their faces lit up at the volcano and dirt, the river, and the standoff between T-rex and stegosaurus.

Birthday celebrations, for me, are labors of love. Did I need to plan out the day to include what they had both decided on as a theme? No. And I will most certainly regret this tradition as they get older and can’t decide on a shared theme. (Two birthday cakes; two themed decorations; etc.) But, it was well worth the tight squeezes and effusive “thank yous” and exclamations of “this is just what I wanted!”

In the aftermath, after everyone had piled into bed­ – filled with cake and ice cream, and visions of all their new presents from friends and family ­­– my husband and I raised a glass: five years of parenting.

We recalled our move from St. Louis to Montgomery, two weeks after their birth. We remembered the isolation of not knowing anyone in our new city to call on for help. We relived the panic and desperation of multiple hospital visits with feeding specialists. And who could forget the onset of a global shutdown, forcing us to isolate alone with twins who were only six months old?

But, we also remembered the laughter in the midst of the chaos. All of the milestones and
challenges were overcome. We recognized their individual personalities emerging and developing their own interests, friends and identities.

As kindergarten looms ahead of us, I’m reminded of their curiosity, tenacity and passion. I see their desire to go out and explore, to be their own persons, but their hesitancy – their return to grab my hand and make sure that I’m coming along, until they feel ready to go off again on their own.

This is what it means to be 5, dear boys. May you never lose your excitement, laughter and strength. May you always go forth and flourish, yet retain a grasp on what you know to be safety and security.    

hbozantwitcher@clarion herald.org